I am at SXSW this morning. I just came from the session “Is Privacy Dead or Just Very Confused?” about the difference between private and public spheres and how they are contextual and social contract dependent. They talked about how strange facebook was for merging all ones contexts together (this is my own critique of it). This post was written while listening to Dave Morin talk about the future of the facebook platform “The Search for a More Social Web” (it was really a product plug) – As he oppened the talk he gave us a history of human communication that had the personal computer preceding the ARPA Net (clearly he would benefit from a visit to the Computer History Museum where we hold the Internet Identity Workshop twice a year). While listening I can’t help but keep wondering if I am just to “old”.
When I was in my first year of university at UC Berkeley the web was just beginning to diffuse to widespread use in that context. We had LAND LINES then. I spent $300 a month on long distance to talk to friends back home in canada. I was not “socially” connected via electronic media back then. Some people from my “old lives” have found me in facebook but I don’t feel “socially connected” to them in that I really don’t think they care about what I am “doing now on the web” and I don’t really have an ongoing social relationship with them so that i want to know “all” about what they are doing. They are NOT my “friends” but in facebook they “are”. I don’t want to be rude and unfriend them I am “interested” in their lives – like would be interested in hearing from them once every couple months but they are not in my social world.
I notice a real gap between myself and those 10 years younger then me who had facebook IN highschool and college – they love it cause it keeps them connected to their “friends”. I wonder about this cultural social time divide.
Today I am hearing facebook talk again about how they have people’s “real identities” with their “real names” and how important this is for authenticity. Dave Morin is going around convincing people to switch from their online personal handles in twitter to their “real” names. I thought about just being “Kaliya” in twitter but decided that my online twitter persona and voice would be that of my “professional” self – “IDENTITY WOMAN” I do talk about some personal things I do and mention opinions outside of “just my professional self” but it is not “me” there are ideas and opinions and things i do on the web that are not for everyone to see and I don’t share them in twitter. What I don’t like about facebook and the idea of facebook connect is that it feeds “everything you do” by default to “everyone you know” (within that system – they call these people “friends”). I want to present different selves to different audiences not because I want to “hide” but because I am connected to very diverse communities/friends and they all don’t want to hear about everything I am going everywhere it is to much “social noise.”
I am not sure if Facebook understands that having people use their “Real Names” is not actually what creates authenticity – the issue has been on the web is not “who you are in real life” but the inability to have online persona’s that are persistent over time and context. The investment into these and the ability to have them be useful has not been solved until recently. Bob (his blog is Cesi n’est pas un Bob – a reference to the Rene Magritte painting Ceni n’est pas une pipe/This is not a pipe) and the folks at the Burton Group have been talking about the possibility of people creating Limited Liability Persona’s to create persona’s on the web that are linked to “you” if something goes wrong but is not linked.
The audience of mostly young men in their 20’s and 30’s many of them “developers” on the facebook platform cheered all that was announced today by Dave Morin. I was left wondering and wrote this post as a response.
I am a member of the bridge generation – between the hyper connected young “digital natives” and the digital immigrants. (I was on BBS’s in Highschool (the local school board set one up just for kids within the city school system – that is where I hung out). My child hood home had a rotary telephone). while on vacation in Canada this summer I was struck by the conversations that I overheard by people older then me dabbling in facebook and being kind of freaked out by it. (In Canada Facebook has much higher penetration into the “general” population). The conversations I was having with highlevel leaders in the nonprofit and social business world at a retreat I was at about the dangers of building on closed silo’s like facebook was just beginning to dawn on them – they now understood. I am also a woman and the conversation we had at She’s Geeky regarding women and their presentation of self and identity online was really good. WE ARE DIFFERENT then dudes in their 20’s in San Francisco.
So I wonder… Am I to “old” to get Facebook? – or do they not get it? “it” being the needs of older people and the ability to control in more fine grained ways what people see about me. “it” being the needs of women in social space online.
We shall see.
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[…] her real name (I think!) ) as Kaliya Hamlin – I do so as a sign of respect for what she writes) musing about the same sort of thing, after a session on Privacy at SXSW, which had involved lots of (young male) FB […]
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[…] there Josh and I started talking about one of the things I blogged about the Facebook post I did from Day one of SXSW. I am not sure if Facebook understands that having people use their “Real Names” is not […]
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[…] wrote about some of the issues I have with Facebook when I heard Dave Morin talk at SXSW "Am I to "old" to get Facebook – or do they not get it?". I highlighted 3 different […]
You have brought up really interesting points. I agree completely about the need for control of the info that gets shared online (often in surprising ways – and there is no way to undo any damage) and that verifying someone’s “real name” has little to do with authenticity. In some ways, Facebook is marvelous, but the need for human contact is not totally obviated by a few messages on one’s wall, is it?
Teenagers used to spend an inordinate amount of time on the phone and hanging out, and now it’s spent online. Naturally they are not aware of “missing” anything, any more than we were aware of missing the delights of the horse and buggy ride when we were young. Privacy is steadily eroding, but people who grew up without it don’t seem to miss it.
No, Facebook developers totally do not get it, because privacy and hyper-sharing is not an issue for them. This is a generation that welcomes ever-more intrusive technology, such as the GPS feature on your phone letting your “friends” know exactly where you are. The definition of “friend” is pretty loose. Would I feel comfortable with a teenaged daughter letting hundreds of people know where she is, what she’s doing, etc? I don’t want to sound paranoid, but the personal info that gets shared is pretty shocking to people who weren’t brought up on a diet of non-stop info, and safety issues are a real concern.
It’s not that we’re too old to change – what is the incentive to change? We were not accustomed to hearing from anyone, save perhaps a best friend or 2, on a several-times daily basis, nor accustomed to an unceasing onslaught of rather trivial, banal and trite revelations.
I value my personal contacts very, very highly. My real friends. I do not really care if they’re going shopping or performing some other mundane task. Although I welcome genuine news from friends, I do not crave it every few minutes. Facebook (or any other such site) simply may not suit your social style, in which case you might be happier sharing what you want to share (and nothing more!) on a ning-style social networking site or having old-fashioned parties. What can replace the hug of an old friend?
I am a college student (20 years old) and over the past couple months there has been a noticeable trend of parents getting on Facebook. I think it started with people in there 20s, then their friends in their 30s got on, etc. It wouldn’t surprise me if Grandparents eventually joined. Your privacy concern is a great point. These online identities force us to be more transparent with our lives. Pictures and comments can be posted for our whole world to see and there’s not a lot you can do at that time. So if you are trying to hold two different identities, it is not a place to join. However, I think the social network tools are having a great impact on society. I am much closer now to my uncle in California who I used to talk to once a year. Same with my parents while being in college. I love how connected I am with people. Plus, I am to the point where I don’t care what people think of me. I am who I am. I don’t have anything to hide. I’m sure you’ve noticed in the social business sector that these tools help promote the value of your products and services. It is a great way to enlighten people on the damages of the mainstream products. Also, with the constant stream of information with Twitter, Linked-In, Facebook, etc., it has become increasingly difficult for businesses and people to lie about things. The governments will be much more hard pressed to conceal things such as global warming. Although there is a loss in privacy, I think all the social networks will make the world a better place.
Trent Wood
I talked about this topic recently and got mixed reactions, but one of the things that makes the identity and privacy issue interesting for me is the various facets of our human lives. You may be totally open and honest with your family and friends, but is that the information your boss and coworkers should be confronted with as well?
A user can put all their information on the web (technically no privacy), but it could be segmented so that conflicting facets don’t bleed together. Unfortunately, these issues still haven’t been worked out in real life either, so there is no template to build on. Celebrities and politicians have had to deal with this for decades, and now the general public is getting a chance.
I have friends in very small towns that are amazed about what they consider my lack of privacy, but yet everyone in their town knows what everyone else does. There are truly no secrets among the residents, but I am the one who has given up my privacy. Does our society’s concept of privacy contain within it some degree of respect or don’t ask don’t tell? “Your privacy is in tact as long as we don’t speak in front of you.” How different is that from a total stranger knowing about your life? As our world and sphere of influence grow, do they start to become more like a small community again?
Hopefully, identity management on the web can grow in a direction that will allow each person to choose not only what level of detail they want to share, but who they want to share it with.